Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Physician, Heal Thyself

Okay,

So I will admit it.
I hate to.
I don't like to.
I mean, I have an INFANT!



I have 4 kids, some very onry.


But its true,


I AM GETTING OLDER!

Laugh Lines.

Knee Arthritis.
Had to give up jogging and start swimming.

I have to take cholesterol medicine because I like stuff like this.


So there's other medicines I have to take to keep myself working properly.

I decided to purchase some more palatable over-the-counter medicine the other day to assist my being honest with patients and not full of, well, you know.


So I made a fatal mistake.
Now I have made this mistake before and it has resulted in things like this:

Dessitin hair gel


Dessitin balloons

Dessitin cups washes (they get rashes too)


Left-over pankcake breakfast served over shag with juice



Pirate raids of leftover pancakes

Mouths stuffed with who knows what,




and mouths stuffed full of fully organic leaves.


One proud moment was my ice cream, found at 7 am in the hands of a little boy


They had decided to have homemade cookies-and-cream ice cream that morning,
dipping partially frozen cookie dough in the ice cream before munching away.

Spoons, of course, were included, I mean, that is what is proper
(we've taught them well - ALWAYS use utensils).


This one looked guilty, but had no explanation.




This one handled the interrogation well,
seeking comfort in his thumb,
and looking rather pitiful and ignoring the questions.

I must admit, he is a boy with my own heart's desire -
Ice cream in the morning,
candy and chocolate whenever it can be sneaked,
even large gulps of daddy's soda pop.

He definitely has this one right on.

Sitting on the pot and watching TV. He is a boy!

So this day the wonderful strawberry fiber tablet bottle was empty.
So my wife inquired how many the eldest son ate (Bub is his name).
4 to 8 was the deducted reply.
She inquired as to where the rest were.
The little guy (Bud) had some as well as evidenced by the pink drool stains on his shirt.
Some were found in the computer.
The rest, Bub informed us, were cooking in the microwave.



We don't know what the plan was for those, but they were ruined.



So the eldest had eaten a total of 12-20 grams of fiber in a 30 minute period.

The youngest (bud) had eaten 4 grams of fiber in a 30 minute period.


The end result was



having them drink lots of water




Lots of tootles



And I'll spare you the details of the rest of the story.




The moral of this story is...

Physician, protect your medicine.

Always have extra diapers on hand.

If you have kids, go with the powder fiber and keep it in the sugar jar.
Then you will have a psychological draw to taking it,
and your kids will have a psychological aversion to eating sugar.

Enjoy and laugh at the creativity of your kids,
lest you miss the joys of life.

6 comments:

The Unconventional Doctor's Wife said...

Oh my. What memories. And notice I did not say "good" memories.

just a little bit shabby said...

What a "crappy" day you had but I enjoyed your story!

Kimber said...

WOW!! That's all I can say.

SondreLyn said...

I can't stop laughing! Must be all the 'Giggle Choice' I accidently took. And put in the computer. And in the microwave. Funny, funny stuff! What sweet beautiful babies you have! And what a great sense of humor about life's little ups and downs! :D

Farm Chick said...

I love it! My nephews are so creative. :)

Monkey's Momma said...

Well, at least there weren't FOS after that escapade! Sounds like you guys have your hands full!

Fellow health care provider here (RN)visiting from KImber's blog.

Nice to meet you!